Change... It happens, but it works better with intention...

Change... It can be good or bad, or intentional.   Hmmmm, that is an odd statement and I agree.  Let me explain what I mean by that.

I have heard it said the only people that like change are babies. ;)

Change is inevitable for everyone, we will get older and less limber.  You may decide to slow down and take it easy as your time passes you by day after day.  Or you may want to go into a new field or try something different.  Many people hold themselves back from trying something different because they are not "smart enough", "talented enough", "young enough to try something new", "I have this health issue".
Curtis Spolar (http://curtisspolar.com/) said, "Whether it's an excuse or a reason, the results are the same."

In the Magic of thinking Big" chapter 2 by David J Schwartz talks about "excusitis" the failure disease.  This is where Dr. Schwartz talks about people choosing to accept their results because of a particular excuse that they hang on to.

Best selling author and Leadership guru Orrin Woodward (http://orrinwoodwardblog.com/) talks about the scoreboard in his book Resolved.  You can see them at sporting events, game shows and shuffleboard matches. Yeah, I get it JB, keep score.  What does that mean though? It fits nicely into the change topic because your scoreboard will show you where you are at in your development process.  When you follow a self-directed education, you begin to create benchmarks along to the way to rate/track your progress.

Let's say you have a habit of using bad language, and you wish to eliminate this habit from your life.  My grandfather was a great man and owned lumberyards for most of his life. The language wasn't always the best around the lumberyard, and he realized that he had grandchildren and teaching them the language he had learned in the Marine Corps and lumberyard probably wasn't the best idea, so he decided to stop using bad language. What ensued was hilarious. He would make a statement that he wanted to stop swearing, then in the next sentence he would let one bad word slip and then proceed to swear about it. However funny it was it was a perfect example of scoreboard. He had set the goal, and when he fell short of it he was upset with himself.  He wanted to change, but was being so hard on himself that he was creating a feedback loop in his behavior.  That is a whole different blog on re-framing.  Attitude makes all the difference in your journey. See here!

The scoreboard would be your way of tracking it. Ben Franklin created a system of virtues in which he created a "scoreboard" in a notebook and he would rate himself on the virtue he was working on daily. If he felt he had not lived up to the virtue he would place a black mark in the box indicating that he needed to work harder on it. He would go through the thirteen one per week and continue to rotate them throughout the year.

Orrin Woodward has made the statement If you want to change some things, you need to change some things.

Time for action!

What in your Life would you like to change? Why would you like to change it?  What would your life be like if you had successfully changed it? What sign posts are you looking for along the way? How will this help you in getting closer to your dreams and goals?

God Bless!

Comfort...why is it so comfortable?

A certain level of comfort is wanted by the human being, a certain level of discomfort is required by humans to grow and flourish.



"Learn to say 'no' to the good so you can say 'yes' to the best." - John C Maxwell

Why do people say 'no' to better, and 'absolutely not' to attempted excellence? 

This is an interesting question, I have heard answers ranging from; "People hide from success because it is disguised in coveralls"., "I've got a great education and a good secure job.", "I was born this way, and I don't plan on changing." It sounds silly, but a lot of these things are a reality for many people.

I would like to start by explaining Personal Development:

Personal Development

Wikipedia.org gives a great definition:

Personal development includes activities that improve awareness and identity, develop talents and potential, build human capital and facilitates employability, enhance quality of life and contribute to the realization of dreams and aspirations. The concept is not limited to self-help but includes formal and informal activities for developing others, in roles such as teacher, guide, counsellor, manager, coach, or mentor. Finally, as personal development takes place in the context of institutions, it refers to the methods, programs, tools, techniques, and assessment systems that support human development at the individual level in organizations.^[1]

Why is personal development so scary? Why do people find personal development unnecessary? Why do people think personal development is a scam? All great questions certainly, but are they really the right questions? Do people really think they are as good as they can be?

Ok, I will admit that the first personal development book I bought was a secret. I would only read it under the covers after midnight with a flashlight. Although this is a funny example, I would imagine it rings true for many people. It is embarrassing at first to admit that you are not as good as you can be, that doesn't mean that you are less than you should be, you are only as good as the information that you have been programmed with since you were born that you HAD NO IDEA WAS HAPPENING. That being said you are now aware and can no longer use that excuse. Sorry.

Everyone around you had the best intentions in raising you right, and the television and radio wanted to turn you into a good citizen with a mortgage, car payment, cable bill and Friday dinner out.  It seems like the majority of the programming I received was that life was great, you bought more than you can afford if you can afford the payment. Having since then learned many lessons, some that I continue to learn, I have found different information that made my mind think differently about things. Finance information that I learned from.

This information at first made me a little mad that no one had told me about it. No one ever said there was something other than getting a college education, getting a job and then throwing on the cruise control for the next 50 years then maybe getting a cruise vacation with a spouse I haven't spent that much time with over the years and playing Keno on the ship. That sounds really lame to me, not criticizing anyone else's dream life if that is it.  Yet day in and day out people really don't put much thought into it, they distract themselves with this or that and soon enough they are close to retirement, but they never really planned for that. SO, part-time job as a greeter, or some other type of job that pays $8.00 an hour and doesn't demand much. Helps them stay out of the red in their budget.

REALLY? THIS IS WHAT YOU PLANNED? NO IT ISN'T, BUT ITS TOO LATE = LIE.

At anytime you can stop for a second and analyze the situation and see if you are on your desired path. At anytime you can change your approach and get out of debt, add additional income or fall in love with your spouse again. The only difference is information, that information comes from Personal Development.

Personal Development, in particular the LIFE TEAM has given me direction and a vehicle for improvement in my life. It may not be the same for you, you may not be interested in making a difference in this world, but aren't you a little curious?  Sit down and look at the areas of your life that you believe are important, calculate an honest score for yourself in those areas, are you dogging it or killing it?

Read this blog by my wife to help you look at an example of priorities. Read this example of why people settle for mediocrity and average by Nick Nighbor. If you do anything, start to search for answers to your questions.

God Bless.

JB

Checking in. Looking forward to a new blog!

Just thought I would log in quick and drop a note and update my blog. I have been blessed with an amazing wife and a fantastic family and I like to share leadership info with the masses. Thank you for looking. JB Thompson

Success... What is success? How to you accomplish success? Who defines what success is? What will you become successful at? Do you really need to be successful?  I hope to help you find the answers to these questions as I offer an opinion on success...

What is success? The Oxford English Dictionary defines success as:
noun[mass noun]

• 1 the accomplishment of an aim or purpose:the president had some success in restoring confidence
• the attainment of fame, wealth, or social status:the success of his play
• [count noun] a person or thing that achieves desired aims or attains fame, wealth, etc.:to judge from league tables, the school is a successI must make a success of my business
• 2 archaic the good or bad outcome of an undertaking:the good or ill success of their maritime enterprises

What does that mean to you? My inference out of the above definition is one that you or someone else determines a successful situation based off of their opinion of your accomplishment in a certain relative area. In-other-words you can be successful or unsuccessful at anything and everything based on someones opinion, it doesn't even need to be a rational opinion.

Someone could look at a as a local business owner and see you as a mega-success! Even though they are struggling in their marriage (or have gone through a few divorces), bankrupt in their finances and involved in many conflicts with relatives. They may be a success to someone and a failure to another. With this logic it seems very unfair for someone to pass a judgment on someone else for being a success or a failure. There is only one Man whom has ever lived that has the ability to judge, and the game is not over until you are in the ground.

Going a step further let's look at success for you personally... What have you always wanted to do but haven't taken that first step for fear of failure? Has it been wanting to entertain a crowd of cheering fans? Has it been to compete in a tri-athalon? Has it been to not miss church at all for a month? Or was it to organize that huge DVD collection you have so you can find the one you are looking for when you are looking for it? No matter what it is, you are the judge, jury and executioner of your success at these individual goals or dreams. You control the direction of your life, no one else does. Stop being so hard on yourself and start living a significant life.  Stephen R. Covey in 7 Habits of Highly Effective People runs through some great steps to get you on your way to being a success in your own life on your terms. Wait, wait, wait, JB you mean I have to do something? I have to read something and actually think about something other than wake up, brush my teeth, shower, shave and go to work? Nope, you don't have to do anything... but do you want success? Orrin Woodward and Chris Brady have helped many people that are willing to change some behaviors move forward in their LIFE. They have a quote that says, "Winners hate losing enough to change, and loser hate change enough to lose." When you choose to lose, you lose. This is liberating, because then if you choose to WIN, You WIN! This means you define success in your life! You need to turn down the negative voices of others and focus on what you love and what adds value to your fellow man and determine your own success.

My father, Leon Thompson, who has been a great mentor in my life always had a saying, "I would rather shoot for the stars and miss than shoot for a pile of manure and hit." These words ring true no matter what you do.

Success? Do you really need to be successful? The answer is No! You can choose to do whatever you would like to do. Your father could have been a very successful banker and may want you to go into banking to honor him. It just so happens that your hot button in life is to act! Your father doesn't see a future in acting, there is no money in it and he wants to protect you from making a foolish decision and living in poverty. So you go into banking and hate everyday of it, but you make a lot of money and are able to afford the "finer" things in life. Bah Humbug! That is no way to live, you have been given a gift, an existence on this planet to answer to more than that, so if acting is your calling then pursue some sort of acting in your life to see if you come alive while doing it.

This last paragraph reminds me of a certain character on a show called "Arrested Development" named Tobias. He was a true dream chaser, trying to get into acting, become a member of the Blue Man Group and many other funny things that he would occupy his time with other than his responsibilities as a man and a father.  I am not encouraging you to tell your wife that you are leaving your job and joining the circus, but instead encouraging you to begin looking inside yourself to find your passion. Bruce Wilkinson in his book The Dream Giver has some practical tools to help you explore and a great story too!

Go out and create your own idea of success, the media doesn't have your best interests at heart. In my opinion, it seems they just want you to fight more, work more, consume more and procreate more. I think you are worth more than that.

God Bless!

JB 

Fear and Faith...

I look to a lot of sources for inspiration and information. Many of the sources I choose come from notable and memorable figures from the world's history. Today I was reading through Selections From the Writings and Speeches of William Randolph Hearst. People throughout history have had mixed feelings in regards to Hearst and the manner in which he conducted business. Many have seen Citizen Kane a great movie loosely based on the life of Hearst.  I encourage you to look into Hearst and his life. He may not be the prime example of an individual, which there was only one ever in existence, you can see a driven man who made and left a mark in our world that will last forever. He left a legacy.

He had many speeches and articles that he wrote. Some of the best that I have read he had written to the paper boys that delivered his papers. He gave them a practical guide to life and success that was similar to him mentoring the boys himself. As I read through this book today and checked out some articles I came across an article that was published on October 22, 1941 entitled "Fear and Faith" I do not have any publishing rights to republish this, but I wanted to share it with you. I couldn't find it anywhere online. So here it is as printed in the book published in 1948, just two years after my father was born.

Fear and Faith
"In the News" -- October 22, 1941.

Fear is a dreadful thing.
It incapacitates the mind, numbs the nerves, disables the muscles, perverts thought and paralyzes action.
Take a plank and lay it on the ground.
You can walk the plank without the slightest difficulty.
You can run across it--Skip across it.
To do so is no task, no strain because you have no fear.
But suspend that plank 200 feet in the air and contemplate walking across it.
You falter, you tremble.
Your knees grow weak, your heart grows faint, your head becomes dizzy.
And if in that condition you try to cross the plank you will fail and fall.
There is nothing the matter with you, however, but fear.
You are thinking about what might happen to you if you missed a step.
Your mind is concentrated upon the consequences of failure.
When you can think only of the certainty of success you will succeed...
We know what evil fear will wreak.
We know what strength the spirit gives, what healing and upholding it exerts.
Why should we not be free from fear?
Why should we not all have a deeper confidence in the goodness of man and a surer faith in the love of God.

end.

Wow, what a great passage. I feel that sometimes in life fear is so common that it invades our subconscious mind and becomes ingrained as part of our daily life. My wife Carrie and I were discussing negativity and negative thoughts and how they can command a controlling interest in your life.  I am working hard everyday to develop a personal system that can combat those negative thoughts and eliminate them the best I can from my life.  The best analogy that I could come up with is that negative thoughts are like heat seeking missiles.

The best way to start this out is like the conversation that my wife and I had. I found out that not everyone shared my love for aviation at a young age which involved lots of reading, movies and video games about fighter jets and the pilots that flew them. When I was young there was no one cooler than a fighter jet pilot. These guys were tough, in-shape and had cool sunglasses, not to mention they flew some very powerful machines that had a lot of explosives on them. WOW!

I was excited, Carrie not so much.

During the Vietnam war there was development beginning for "heat-seeking missiles". These heat seeking missiles were designed for destroying bombers by finding a heat signature and zeroing in on the signature and blowing it up.  They would be able to follow the heat generated by the engine and then destroy the target. So naturally the people in the targeted aircraft didn't really want to be blown up, so they developed a flare that would trick the heat-seekers into thinking that the flare was the target and not the actual aircraft. (It seems like ti would be so easy to explain until you start explaining it.) Since they then had flares that would distract and disable the missiles more pilots could live and fight another day.

Similarly we can use this example with our own minds. Now this may be a stretch for you where you are currently at, and that is OK. Take it one step at a time. After you realize that there are positive and negative thoughts in your mind, this will make a lot more sense. Read chapter One in the Magic of Thinking Big  by David J Schwartz, PH. D. entitled "Believe you can succeed and you will." Mr Triumph and Mr Defeat are Positive and negative thoughts.

Mr Defeat in my example would represent the "heat-seeking Missile" and Mr Triumph would equal the flare that destroys the missile. Every time Mr Defeat is starting in your mind, launch out a flare of Mr Triumph and stop the negative thought. For example you would like to start reading the new book that your mentor recommended. You take it out and look at it, and say to yourself 'This may be above my level, I'm not ready for this yet,' In the middle of that sentence you need to deploy the flare of 'I may not understand everything, but I am fully capable of learning and understanding.' This is a more positive viewpoint and will encourage you along the journey.

I have just begun this journey myself, but the visual image of shooting a flare in my brain makes sense and it is fun for me to stop those negative thoughts. I encourage you to check with your mentor and seek out something that can help you. Don't have a mentor? Read the Magic of Thinking big! Dr. Schwartz has a great way to set the tone.

Thank you and God Bless.

The Law of attraction... the process...

I myself think I had a major breakthrough in my life today while I was studying some material on the law of attraction. I am not speaking of "The Secret", although this is a great resource for people beginning to understand the law of attraction. If you look at all the material out in the written world with all of the "Law of attraction gurus" and you will see many similarities amongst them and not so much along the lines of originality. The two works said to have spawned it all are The Master Key System and Earl Nightingale's The Strangest Secret.  These two works are a great way to look at the sub-concsious mind and see how the material world interacts based off of your thoughts and habits. Although they do not hold a candle to the bible and Jesus Christ who was the original "Guru of the law of attraction".

The bible speaks many truths that are still true today in regards to the law of attraction. John 1:14 "The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth." It speaks of thoughts becoming things.  We speak and think ourselves into the life that we have. We have created this life in our minds first, then God helps us all create it outside of ourselves.

So onto my big breakthrough! It all happened when I was watching a recording of a live seminar. The name of the speaker is not important and he was rather rude and obnoxious to boot. The point of the seminar was even vague and poorly reproduced for the Internet. Anyhow when he was talking about people getting caught up in the process and not focusing on the outcome or result I was hit between the eyes in a major way. I had heard the statement "don't get stuck in the process" so many times and it had not registered with me. DON'T GET CAUGHT UP IN THE PROCESS! I have spent many years working for someone else, listening to teachers, listening to professors and following directions. The process is directions! I felt as long as I was in the process I was doing great, this focuses less on results and more on activity. Activity is a necessary part of the process, but it is not the result. I need to start learning to focus on what results I want from the process, not the process itself.

There are numerous examples of this all around us everyday. Why are we so busy? We feel the need to accomplish things, we are commissioned by God to accomplish things... but what are we accomplishing and how is this moving us forward to our purpose? If we decide in our minds that we want to lose weight, we know the logical steps. As Tim Marks would say, "Eat less, move more." This seems so simple, but it is so hard! What do you mean I can eat cheeseburgers, pizza and doughnuts everyday? I eat less of them. That is not enough. If I want the true result I need to do the activity. If I do not do the activity, even if I sit around all day and visualize the victory it is not going to advance me any closer to the goal I wish to achieve.  I need to get into action! I need to set a goal and go out and take that first step.

What is your goal? What do you think should be your first step? What knowledge or resources do you have that may help you in your quest? Why are you going on this quest? Where could you get help from someone that has gone through the quest you are beginning now? What are you going to do right now to help you advance closer to your goal right now? Stop reading and take that first step. Move forward in faith and the Lord will be there to help you.

Have a great day!

Value Exchange and the "average" bully...

I have had a heavy issue upon my heart today and it has to do with many things that change in a person's life, and how they deal with those changes. Some would say that other people are "Wrong" or "Stupid" or they can not believe that a person could feel that way. Negative, Positive, Elitist or otherwise.

 We all have a limited stay on this planet which is a blessing that has been given to us to do with what we wish. I want to start out talking about value.  In Wisconsin lately there have been attitudes flaring, and many angry people talking about our Governor and saying he is a bully, and calling him other names. Many people are saying that he is "ruining everything" and that he is "not being fair".  Be that as it may, the reaction to anything is always in the approach.  Zig Ziglar once said, it isn't the direction of the wind, but the set of the sail. How we respond to things shows what type of person we are. Now don't go off on me saying I support what he is doing because I am asking everyone to take a look at themselves and how they are reacting.  Look into the facts, not the media hype. I am not aware of all the facts, nor to I claim to be even reasonably informed. I have loved ones who will be affected by these governor decisions, but it is not within my sphere of influence to affect the outcome of this new legislation. The winds are always changing, it is how you react to the changing of the wind that determines your future.

It seems that most people are attacking teachers for their salaries and saying that they are not worth what they are paid. It seems like the argument about teachers making a salary of according to someone I know $66,000/year. Now I don't think personally that "average" teachers make that. I was also told that most teachers drive Escalades and live in huge houses.  I'm not sure if I agree with that either. I have seen people that receive government support that drive Cadillacs, Chrysler 300's and other high end vehicles that can't afford them.  The only point I am trying to make here is that we should all look at the facts and not start targeting specific jobs and name calling them.  We all make choices, they choose to teach. I know personally my parents spent thousands of dollars on school supplies that they needed that the district couldn't provide for them. Maybe if they wouldn't have contributed to that they would both be driving Escalades instead of Toyotas. (Toyotas are great cars by the way)

OK, so then the next part of my thoughts, I believe that people choose to pay for what they pay for via a fair exchange for value. Basic marketing principle is that the price of anything purchased is what the average person is willing to give up in exchange for that product or service. Some people are willing to give up around $250.00 a month for cable TV/Internet/Phone service. Some people choose to give up $500/Month to drive a nice car. Others choose to give up $200/month for leadership materials that benefit them in their life. What is the price you are willing to pay for your future?

A $500/Month lease on a vehicle for 60 months equates to $30,000. At the end of that 60 months you own nothing. Watching television has an opportunity cost as well as a hefty price tag some people spend $250/Month for television. Let's say you move out at age 18 and subscribe to this service until you are 65 that is 47 years so if you do the math $141,000 spent on entertainment and communication from home. WOW! $3000.00 a year on entertainment (Just at home) that takes time away from friends, family, hobbies and generally doesn't do good things for your health.

I am not saying that it is wrong to have television, I am just asking you to consider the value you are exchanging for television. What are you giving up? $3000.00 a year will get you a nice little vacation with your significant other. 

Most people will react negatively to an attitude like this. Why are you taking away my television? How am i supposed to find out what happens on Gray's Anatomy? Who is winning American Idol? Do these outcomes weigh heavily on your heart? Is this something that in the grand scheme of things, when you are at the end of your life. When the final moment comes will you look back and say, "I am glad I never missed an episode of Survivor, I am a better human being because of it."

The "average" bully is someone who makes you reconsider a decision you have made. Let's say you wanted to go on a diet.  You lay out a game plan for yourself that you are going to eat more of certain things and less of others and that you are going to exercise. You are excited about this, you are going to get back down to your fighting weight!  Then on Monday with a smile on your face and determination in your heart you step into work. You confess you your best work buddy (Who is not at his fighting weight) that you are going to make a lifestyle change. He scoffs and says that it is too hard to do that, so why bother. Then to further his encouragement of you the next few days are filled with "How's your salad fitness boy, you don't look like you are losing any weight yet!" "Told you that wouldn't work, gosh your stupid." The "average" bully can always be counted on to stay average.

I hope this has offered some insight for you, and added some value to your day.